With festive fun dried down and now back to my 'basics' ogling the blue-chrome window screen and dysfunctional server — the mind seeks for makeover. Arrogance subdued and enthusiasm hitting the lowest bed, I felt as deadbeat. There's an ennui left around and I am lost, midway. Oh! Depressed? Nah…
I'm disgruntled. Disappointed. Hopeless.
To be honest, I am scared. I’m scared to lose and now the feeling deepening within me. Losing? Huh! Lose what? Ain’t you know I am soft and possessive and I am scared of losing closeness, lose the touch—always, forever. Lol! Scared of losing that never owned…[Sigh!]
I do.
I like to run. I want to hide in some desolated land and live with nothingness. Nothing to pin for or to be faithful I would rather live as *nothing* and pass silently. I am scared to lose. (Again, again) Boy, lemma correct you, “you are *NOTHING*” and with nothingness encompassed…
Oh, my faith dwindles. I don’t wanna lose thee.
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